Chat Hosts roasting on an open fire…………

If only!

Of course I could just ignore the whole thing….at  least as far as this blog is concerned.

However, everyone else seems to be having something to say so I guess I might as well join in….

OK, let’s deal with the (let’s face it) voodoo premises on which the whole thing is precariously perched….

Let’s be honest, any story appearing today that involved virgin birth, extra-terrestrial visitors and giving birth in a stable would probably appear in the National Enquirer and the likes of us would probably be sneering at the credulity of the Trailer Trash who believed in any of it….and the Police Anti-Terrorist Unit would no doubt be interested in any sudden influx of  Middle Eastern royalty….

Then there’s the materialistic frenzy of it all…..I think I’m fortunate in that the people I spend Christmas with are relatively restrained these days, but you just know that some people are having it large out there…..especially John Terry and his family.  Not going to moralise because we are all hungry ghosts in our own ways, but you do wonder at some people’s appetite for excess…

What else?  Wall-to-wall drivel on television with far too much Jonathan Ross, Graham Norton, Ant and bloody Dec, Russell bleedin’ Brand, Stephen Fry etc etc…’s like Johnny Clarke’s timeless couplet from You never see a nipple in the ‘Daily Express’ – “Where William Hickey meets Michael Caine……again and again and again and again!”  I’d like to get even grumpier about this, but it’s hard to generate much bile about one bunch of nonentities interviewing another endlessly and they all appear on one another’s shows until the whole thing blurs into an endless chatquizcomedyreview hosted by Jonathan BrandDec with special guest Russell AntRoss and it just drones endlessly on until New Year hoves into view and it’s time to swap the Christmas ‘jokes’ for the New Year ‘jokes’……..where is Alexei Sayle when you really need him?  He’d soon sort these greasy spiv bastards out……

Is there anything I like about it all?   The people are what saves it from total meltdown I guess, but I’m clutching at straws here…..

Mercifully, it’ s soon over with…..




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